The ‘Hairdresser Effect’ in Buying Eggs

There’s a point at which too much consideration of a subject becomes detrimental to its health. I call this the ‘hairdresser effect.

How many hairdressers do you know with a decent haircut?

There are some, sure, but most seem to have over thought the whole damn idea to the point it stops impacting positively on the health and style of their hair... like people who’re always modifying their car and it’s always in the shop. It might as well be called the mechanic’s effect or the stylist’s effect, or so many others. The premise remains. Overthinking something that is best left alone…

I have spent the last few years comparing egg box packaging with this in mind. Having a thought out term for over thinking things, and doing longitudinal studies of egg boxes is a red flag I am not unaware of in myself too.

Most of what I write about are things I have thought about too much. Once I sat down and thought about the best color trousers to wear. I sat very still for a few hours and got up and put on a pair of blue trousers and have only worn the same blue trousers for around four years now. When they get old and need to be retired, I order another of the same ones.

Just leave the thing alone. Stop thinking about it.

Eggs.

The best eggs come from hens that are left alone in as much nature as possible. There’s not much an egg farmer can or should do…

It is not easy to know how involved they have got, how much of the natural process has been circumvented to speed up growth, production rates, and so on.

There are two processes in the cycle — the creation of the egg, and then the egg finding its way to you.

It is fairly impossible to know how much the farmer has interfered in the first process but if there are signs that he or she has not done much in the second process, this could be an indicator that the hen was largely left alone to do it’s thing and had a healthy life.

A farmer that has given little thought to the branding and packaging of the product has most likely applied to same laissez-faire attitude to the hen making the damn thing.

Too much thought equals the hairdresser effect - dry, brittle, and undercut cause a client was late and they were playing with a shaver…

Here are some of my best eggs boxes over the last few years.

HATHAWAY FARM 8/10

+ Uneven edges of the label points towards kitchen scissors being used by children as part of a fun family project. Lax quality control is a bonus here.

+ Hathaway is a strong name. I again get the sense this is a home project not run out of necessity, or with pressure from shareholders.

+ No fine print. They aren’t trying to protest too much. Extra points for saying happy hens.

— I uploaded the image on Google and got no hits. This is probably original artwork, which shows more thought than needed.

POSTSCRIPT: I researched the owners and retract the last point. They feed the hens heirloom kale and grow all sorts of interesting things on their smallholding. Original artwork was produced because they just have style.

AFRIKARA EGGS 6/10

+ Simple design. In theory they are called Afrikara Eggs but the design and layout lends itself to them being called just, ‘Farm Eggs’ which has a nice redundant, lack of marketing-type thinking to it.

— Lots of contact info. Possibly too much, in light of not even having a name for the eggs. That said, I went to the website and it was down. It had all the coding up. So I like that they haven’t even sorted out their site. It bodes well.

— Website says it is run on Rudolph Steiner principles. Not against this. Quite the opposite. But weary of a set of principles when the idea is just leave them be in nature and take the egg from the butt and put it in a box.

WHITE MOUNTAIN 9/10

+ So much to say here… Two identical size labels, half stuck over each other in a way that really throws a middle finger to any thought or consideration.

+ Cool mystical sounding name. Feels like Jodorowsky eats these eggs.

+ Random Afrikaans word thrown into the address. Lack of continuity implies they’re not really fussed here. These are just great hens.

+ A gmail account rather than their own domain. Shows the focus is not on the unnecessary detail.

+ Random use of green color for ‘FARM EGGS’. As above.

— Cannot fault this one. You could not go more simple. Turns out the owner’s brother is a homeopath and they use “silica applied at every moon Saturns opposition” in the farming process. No idea what this is about but I am into it.

NOW 9.5/10

I am a bit concerned about the revamp. This seems to be an updated label.

Clearly someone realised they did not need the postal address written in a different language.

I went onto their facebook page and they have a cow called Kate who licks the camera so I am still going to score this highly. They also have a vortex flow form system and I am a huge fan of Viktor Schauberger so I am keeping the high rating. I am actually bumping it up cause they vortex their water and didn’t tell you on the box.

? 5/10

+ I am undecided on this one. A round stamp on a corrugated egg box… It could be read as not-interference in the cycles of nature to produce this offering, or just carelessness.

— I want to like it. There’s no name. One of the three words seems to be ‘fruit.’ Intrigued but more concerned.

FARMER ANGUS 6/10

+ It’s kinda nice to see a picture of the hens. I am torn. I like to know all those things but I worry if that’s just the problem… we live so much in our heads and crave all this data… Feels like a bit of a helicopter hen dad.

— I think he protesteth too much. I buy their meat and like their story but I have to mark it down if I am to stick to my system of rating. There is too much thought that has gone into this. I would still choose these over anything found in a normal store.

EGGCELLENT 8/10

+ the name makes me feel like it’s a side project started by some dad who likes puns and his kids found some Clipart images online.

— It does have a lot of writing but it is offset with poor artwork and layout which reassures me they only care about the hens being happy.

MOSES 10/10

+ An elderly lady who swims in the Camps Bay tidal pool every day me gave me these. She has more energy and zest for life than me despite being more than twice my age.

+ A man called Moses delivers them to her every week. That’s all I know. This is nothing but pure, wholesome egg energy. No branding, no name, no info, just these incredible specimens.

+ Most of them have double yokes and are a deep orange color. They have not been washed. They are all totally different shapes

+ The packaging I received them in is a Tupperware I have to return to my new friend, Hillary. This wins on all fronts.

— I cannot fault them. I am getting Moses’s number for home delivery.

Here they are laid out for better viewing

I write and direct stories that remind me why I write and direct stories. www.davemeinert.com